Emphasis On Moms
You are a Mom~ You are aWife~ You are a Lady~
Don't run from who you are ~ embrace it!
Love One Another ~
By Ginia Dible
"No, no!" I said. "You'll hurt your sister if you hit her hard like that. Here, this is how you love her. Rub her hand. Kiss her gently on the forehead."
I showed him. And then I helped him so he could see what "gentle" meant.
I still see him in my mind: A big lunky three-year-old leaning down to gently kiss the tiny baby. I smiled at him. "You're going to be a really good big brother," I said. He grinned.
The love for his baby sister came naturally. But how to express it appropriately? He needed to learn that.
Now, a decade later, I'm still teaching them how to love each other.
"Listen to her when she talks. I know some of her subjects are boring, but you love your sister. Listen a few minutes and then find something you're both interested in. Talk about that."
I find ways to help them spend time together: The leaves need raked; I send them both. Someone wants to make cookies; let's all do it together.
We rarely separate our children. When they have an argument, instead we keep them together and make them work it out. When they were younger, that required a lot of parental involvement. As they grew, we told them what to say to each other: I'm sorry. That hurt my feelings. I care about you. I didn't understand. I didn't mean to. I'm sorry I hurt you.
Sometimes treating each other like friends is just plain required. There are repercussions when one trashes the other in front of friends. If your sibling is being honored (however small) at his or her club, you go. Not just the parents attend; siblings are required to as well.
I see too many families around us with sibling groups who do not treat each other well. Constant bickering. Downright meanness. Giving embarrassing secrets away to classmates. How could they possibly want to remain friends once they're old enough to leave the nest?
Someday, the three siblings will be all that's left of this family of five. We parents will be gone. But we can help our children be fast friends throughout adulthood, so that they are there for each other long into old age.
It begins now. If we establish this relationship now when they are young, then when they are old they will not depart from each other. What a wonderful way to extend the love we parents have for our children - we'll keep it going long into the future, with each other!
~ Author Ginia Dible writes regularly on motivating children to read. Find her ideas at www.KeepKidsReading.com. She welcomes your ideas.